Day 10

The old Taxis I loved as a kid in NYC

www.51in51days.blogspot.com is a blog about the journey of getting my life back 

on track in the 51 days leading up to my 51st birthday on January 13, 2013.

DAY 10

I am still feeling a little under the weather from something that happened on Saturday night. Let's just say I went to a meeting, and ended up getting used as a taxi service. This experience left me deflated, and that is why I was unable to write yesterday. I was really down. However, it got me to thinking about something someone said to me. Well I've heard it several times actually. "When people speak to you, it's the universe speaking through them." So I pondered that. The universe wanted me to chauffeur this woman around? Possibly. So the universe wanted me only to go to this meeting to assist her, with no gain for myself, just to drive an hour one way and waste several hours while this woman tricked me into to being her taxi? Again, possibly. But if so, then the universe speaks through people in some really horrendous ways. And being a taxi service on a Saturday night is the least of them. 

Talking about this subject, why bad things happen to people, is a sore subject for me. Many of my friends who subscribe to new age philosophy say the universe is teaching me a lesson. However, what about those people who live in third world countries who starve to death? That is some hard lesson. Or what about a bunny rabbit that gets devoured by a mountain lion? I mean Jesus, I guess the universe is saying "We don't need your cuteness around here anymore." CRUNCH. I mentioned all the poor and wonderful animals in US shelters that get put down daily from no fault of their own. I was told that the animals that die are teaching us a lesson. Really? Easy to say when you're not the dog being euthanized. I was even told that, "The Jews who died in WWII were being taught a lesson." I mean come on? I think it's more likely that Hitler was a sadistic mad man, and the human race is capable of some real mean shit. My philosophy or questions don't go over very well with New Age people. They tell me that everything that happens to me is my own fault. I created it. Really? I have power over time and space? No I don't. So the victims in the 2009 Tsunami created that? I really don't think so. Or the victims on 9/11 created it? They were in the wrong place, at the wrong time. The universe is chaotic and beautiful all at once, and in my opinion, by the grace of God go I.

Oh, yes, and speaking of God, I've also been told I am God. No to that also. I am created by God, I agree. And apart of God and the Universe. I'll agree to that too. But I'm not God. I can connect with God on some level and feel his presence in my physical form with my luminous light body. (Please refer to Day 7 of blog for more on luminous light body) That I'll agree to also.  But I am not God. Sorry.

The under belly of the food chain. Big bear trumps cute and cuddly.

Take a look at nature. It's beautiful and lovely, but it's also down right brutal. Shit happens and it's not because you thought a negative thought, or the cute bunny thought a negative thought. Shit happens, plain and simple. Their are predators in nature just like there are in the human race. It's the way the universe works. All you have to do is look at the food chain and see both sides of the universe.

To me it's the yin and yang of life. Good and bad. I've also been told there is no good and bad, there just is. I don't subscribe to that either. I've been told that good and bad only exists due to the ego being judgemental. Then I am guilty. There might be a scale as far as where things land vibrationally, however there are things that I would describe as evil and wicked. The crimes of Hitler as mentioned above as being one of them. But in my opinion wicked and evil happens every day in the world.  This idea of no bad or good, there just is, is really ridiculous to me. The people that say that have never really had anything bad happen to them. I've also been told that death is beautiful. Well maybe it is. It is part of nature, and I totally accept that. But when it is taken from you, then maybe the circumstances of death are not beautiful, then they might be downright wicked.

PET OR MEAT? It really depends on your vantage point

But being God and knowing why bad things happen to good people, is not something I can subscribe to. That's a mystery. Anyone who tells you otherwise is guessing and in my opinion believing something to make themselves feel better. Thinking that you control your destiny and that the universe is not chaotic and scary is a way to feel safer and more secure. Thinking you can get hit and killed by a bus tomorrow just because, is really not a calming thought. Bad things do happen to good people. I know they've happened to me. And I really don't think the cute cuddly bunny had anything to do with looking like a tasty snack to their predator. I don't think the bunny created it. It's the way the world works, and if you happen to be born a cute cuddly bunny, then you just may be shit out of luck if a preditor is hungry and seeing you between two slices of bread. And that is just a fact.

Elissa is a freelance writer & graphic designer somewhere in Los Angeles.

Until tomorrow and Day 10 of my blog....